In Memorium: Rumson Native, Mom & Wife, Mary Patey

“I have chosen a lifestyle that fits me. I pray that you will have the same good fortune as I have had.”
Mary Patey

Native Rumsonite Mary Patey summed up her life in this memoir on her 90th birthday. Her chosen fitting lifestyle and the good fortune that came with it came to an end on Jan. 10 with her passing. She was 91.

With “heavy hearts and grateful spirits” her loved ones reflected on the life she cherished …

Born on Jan. 22, 1927 in the Oceanic neighborhood of Rumson, to the late Andrew and Veronica (Schultz) Heckt, Mary had many loved her life on the Navesink River, her trips to the beach in Sea Bright with her parents and two younger sisters, Vera and Joan.

After graduating from Red Bank Catholic High School, Mary worked at Fort Monmouth during World War II. Later, while commuting to her job at Hanson-Van Winkle-Munning, she met Drew Patey, the love of her life. They married in 1944 and raised six children in Rumson.

Mary shared her love of the peninsula and waterfronts with her family spending “many happy summers at Ship Ahoy and Peninsula House beach clubs in Sea Bright,” creating family beach time traditions.

Remembered by her children as a devoted mother, she was actively involved in the Holy Cross School PTA. Mary’s involvement in advocacy for students with special needs led to her being honored by the Rumson Board of Education, as well as receiving formal recognition from the NJ State Board of Education, where she was appointed to the State Parent Advisory Council.

“We were blessed to have her guidance throughout our lives. Her intellectual curiosity and interest in current events were unmatched. She shared her wit and wisdom with all those with whom she crossed paths. She was old when she was young, and young when she was old …
“During this challenging time, we will continue to celebrate her life. Mary’s qualities of strength, integrity, character, faith, humor and artistic ability will live on in us.”
Family of Mary Patey in her obituary

The family lived in Rumson until 1985, when Mary and Drew relocated to Homossa, FL. They also lived in Sugarmill Woods. In Florida, the couple was integral in establishing the parish of St. Thomas The Apostle Catholic Church. Soon after, Mary was appointed director of Daystar Life Center by Father James Hoge, the pastor of St. Benedict Church.

After Drew’s death, Mary moved to Sunflower Springs ALF in Homosassa in 2013, where her leadership skills continued to shine. She soon became the president of the Resident’s Council.

“During her tenure at Sunflowers Springs, Mary fostered a culture of camaraderie, and was a confidant to all that lived there,” her family said in her obituary. “Mary was often asked to provide tours and meet with prospective residents; the friends and relationships she built with residents and staff members were bonds she truly cherished.”

Mary was preceded in death by: her husband of 54 years, Drew; and sons Michael (father of Renee and Ale Patey) and Robert Patey.

She is survived by: son, Andrew (Mel) Patey; daughters, Beth (and Greg) Whealin and their daughter Nora Patey, Laura Patey (and Leigh Powers) and their sons Jesse and Alex, and Amy Hewitt (and Richard) and their son Jack; sisters, Vera McConnell and Joan Disch; five nieces and one great-grandchild.

A mass of christian burial will be celebrated on Thursday, March 12, 2020 at 10 a.m. at St. Thomas The Apostle Catholic Church of Homosassa with Fr. Glenn Diaz, celebrant.

Inurnment will follow at Florida National Cemetery at 12:30 P.M. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations in Mary’s name be made to Daystar Life Center, 6751 W. Gulf to Lake Highway, Crystal River, FL 34429. Services entrusted to Wilder Funeral Home, Homosassa. www.wilderfuneral.com