Everything’s gonna be alright Everything’s gonna be alright Nobody’s gotta worry ’bout nothing Don’t go hitting that panic button It ain’t near as bad as you think Everything’s gonna be alright Alright, alright
Kenny Chesney ~ Everything’s Gonna Be Alright
They called him Joe T. He never hit the panic button. And he was more than alright … with a smile, a nod, a laugh and a reassuring pat on the back.
He was a loving husband. He was a devoted dad. He was a dedicated volunteer. He was a calming presence. He was a jokester. He was a beacon of hope, inspiration, fun and laughter. He was a loyal friend. He was just plain, no-nonsesense full of life. And, last year, he lost his life. But, longtime Fair Havenite and Fire Department/First Aid Squad guy Joe Truex lives on in the memories he made with purpose. He was toasted by loved ones in a “never forget” tribute party on Friday night, the one-year anniversary of his death, organized by his wife, Ethel Hodgkiss Truex.
“When tomorrow starts without me, don’t think we’re far apart. For every time you think of me, I’m right here in your heart.”
And she is remembered and in the hearts of many as girl who grew up in Rumson, graduated from RFH and raised her family in Fair Haven. She is remembered as a longtime Fair Haven mom, neighbor and friend. She is Helen Apy.
Helen passed away at the age of 81 on May 18. She will be remembered with at service at 2 p.m. on Saturday at The United Methodist Church of Red Bank 247 Broad Street, Red Bank. Home.
Helen Apy
Many remember Helen as Karen and Ed’s mom and a Fair Haven recreational girls’ softball and basketball coach and referee. They remember seeing her friendly smile and wave in the Acme. They remember her as a welcoming neighbor whose home was always open to friends and family. Messages of sympathy flooded social media upon Helen’s death. But, yesteryear neighbor Robin Drake Fitch summed up the sentiments with her tribute:
“I grew up with Mrs. Helen Apy as our wonderful, kind, caring, warm-hearted, generous, strong in so many ways, backdoor neighbor at the corner of Dartmouth and Hunting,” she said. “I learned so much from her. Just a few weeks ago I was telling a friend about her, and something she taught me over 50 years ago about respect! Long lasting lessons from a loving neighbor and friend.”
Yes, those are the subtle, yet lasting memories of community that stay with us forever. Many of us have theses memories of the mom of someone with whom we grew up. Several moms, perhaps. I know I do.
I, too, remember Mrs. Apy. I remember her sincere, warm smile. I remember her direct, caring demeanor. I somehow remember her laugh. I remember her chatting with my mom in the Acme, too. She was one of those ever-present Fair Haven moms. I didn’t know her as well as her neighbors or family, but I do remember her. I knew that she was there, one of those forever Fair Haven moms and neighbors, embracing what was the Fair Haven family without prejudice or pretense. I remember her, like many other Fair Haven moms, caring for people, not things. I remember that she embodied the moms with whom we grew up and respected. And she respected, too. Respect. I do not know what her lesson of respect for her neighbor kid Robin entailed, but I suspect it was one that resonated with clarity.
I know that her own acceptance and respect did. It showed up in her words and smile. More importantly, she showed up. In fact, many years ago, Helen went out of her way to get a message of thanks to me for a memorial piece I wrote about her dear friend. He was another piece of home. I never forgot him or her words of appreciation. It came from a heart at home, after all.
I browsed through Helen Apy’s public Facebook page to honor and remember her. I saw pictures of her happy with her family and her friends. I saw pictures of her Fair Haven home. I saw happy memories. I saw smiles. Then I saw a post from 2018 in which she was looking to come home again, on the hunt for an affordable place. She had been living in North Carolina. A friend told her to stay there. “It’s too expensive here,” she said. “You don’t like it?” Helen’s answer: “I miss home too much.”
Well, you made it back home, Helen. I and many others understand all too well the value of that Fair Haven home and heart. It bears no price tag. And it has nothing to do with property value or nitpicking curb appeal now does it? Rest in peace. You are home. You are remembered.
From Helen Apy’s obituary … some more about her …
Helen Lee Apy, age 81, long time resident of Monmouth County died May 18 at Meridian Health Rehabilitation Center in Shrewsbury.
She was born on May 29, 1937 in Bronx, NY. She grew up in Rumson and graduated from RFH in 1955. She then received her associates degree in Physical Education from Brookdale Community College.
In her free time she was an active member of the First United Methodist Church in Red Bank and spent most of her adult life coaching and refereeing recreational girls softball and basketball in Fair Haven.
She fought for women’s and civil rights her entire life, even attending the March On Washington in 1963.
She is best known for her love of the New York Yankees and her “boyfriend” Derek Jeter as well her endless love and support for her children and grandchildren.
She is survived by: her two children, Edward Apy and wife Kathy Apy, and Karen Apy; grandchildren, Charlie Apy, Nicole Cebulko, Ryan Cebulko, Courtney Glubo and her husband Ryan Glubo; and her great-grandchild Sophie Lee Glubo.
She is predeceased by: her parents Eileen Klamka and John Lee, her brother Joseph Lee Jr., as well as her son Baby Boy Apy and granddaughter Isabella Apy.
The family asks that in lieu of flowers and in honor of her years of volunteer service, please send any donations in honor of Helen to the Salvation Army.
Longtime Fair Havenite and Fair Haven Fire Department Auxiliary member Jeanette M. Allers passed away peacefully at home on May 12, her husband Garry by her side. She was 79.
Most anyone who was schooled in Fair Haven from the 1960s through the 1990s remembers Mrs. Stout. Mildred Stout. She was a first-grade teacher who had that classic kind teacher demeanor and left her mark on many elementary school students.
Actor/producer Brian O’Halloran and Dan Kane Photo/FHFD
Saturday was a traditional night for the stars of the Fair Haven Fire Department Auxiliary to shine with its annual dinner.
And from all accounts, all stars shone brightly. In fact, there was a little bit of all-star mingling across community and career arenas going on during the event.
Fire Department fireman and first aid squad captain, Dan Kane, rubbed elbows and, more aptly, chatted and shook hands with actor/producer Brian O’Halloran, a Middletown guy who is known for his roles in the Kevin Smith movies Clerks, Mallrats, Dogma, Chasing Amy, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back and Clerks II.
Clerks came out in 1994 and was shot in a convenience store in Middletown. Do you remember which store and what section of Middletown? And, in Clerks, there is a scene in which a copy of a newspaper is seen. Do you know which weekly newspaper that was?
The story about Clerks being filmed, before it met with major success at the Sundance Film Festival, was told in that same newspaper that appears in the movie. Smith, himself, worked in the store.
The budget for Clerks was less than $30,000. Once released, it brought in more than $3 million. O’Halloran’s character always had he same last name in all the Smith movies. Do you know what that was?
As for Dan Kane, do you know how many years he has been with the fire company? In capacity as a line officer has he served over the years?
And, as for the true stars of the night on Saturday, the ladies of the FHFD Auxiliary, do you know how long they’ve been hosting this dinner? Favorite food served? What did O’Halloran eat?
Talk about a star-studded night …
Thanks to Dan Kane and the FHFD for the photos!
The FHFD Auxiliary Ladies serving up some dinner Photo/FHFD
A 1976 River Rats crew
Photo/courtesy Marc Edelman, Facebook
Call it a ratty reprise …
Summers in the Rumson-Fair Haven area are rife with river-oriented activities that have become tradition.
River Rats’ sailing “camp” is no exception. OK, nobody was camping per se. It was more like a little club. Still is. In fact, it’s that time of the year when kids start signing up for summer River Rats fun. In fact, it’s about that time to sign up for the Rats season.
It’s been a sort of rite of living on the Navesink passage for decades — since 1955. Kids learn how to boat and do a lot of summer fun bonding in the process.
There’s a new undersheriff in the county and it wasn’t that long ago when he was the Fair Haven police chief.
Darryl Breckenridge, a near-lifetime Fair Havenite, was sworn in by Monmouth County Sheriff Shaun Golden as the officer who runs the law enforcement division of the Sheriff’s Office, the largest agency of its kind in the county.
As director of the Police Academy, Sheriff Golden said in a post that “under his leadership and the hard work of staff attained national accreditation in police training.”
With the new position, Golden said that “Breckenridge is proud to lead the largest law enforcement agency in Monmouth County and eager to maintain and enhance public safety initiatives.”
And there are bound to be more egg hunts over the Easter weekend in many a back yard or living room, depending on family tradition. The home hunt offers a bit more time and less competition for those eggs — or whatever.
Longtime former Fair Havenite Charles Cady is remembered for many things: his service in the U.S. Air Force, his engineering expertise, his love of good music and storytelling, his fondness for friends not yet met, his keen memory and wit, and, his passion for the Porsche and a good life’s ride.
You must be logged in to post a comment.