Old News: Giving Thanks for Missing Spouses, Turkeys, Butts, Beer and a Banshee of a Doctor

To have or have not on Turkey Day …

There were things that were a focal part of tradition on Thanksgiving Day decades ago — in the 1948 Red Bank Register archives, to be exact. Those things are traditions rarely shared, much less championed and advertised now. But, hey, everyone has to live a little … in the past. So, come along with us, again …

That in mind, we take you back to some headlines and ads of that Thanksgiving of 1948. Why? Well, it just seemed like a banner of a microcosm of a year. And then there’s the mind-boggling aspect of the era — what made the top news, the prices, the habits, the must-haves and better-off-withouts. But, who knew?

That top news …

First of all, in the most critical sports news of the area, of course, RFH, which was only Rumson High then, had a banner football headline … “Rumson Wallops Catholic High 18-0 … Jim Roundtree Stars for Bulldogs By Figuring in Each Touchdown”

And what would Thanksgiving be without a missing spouse — or a few. I mean, it’s happened, but making the paper? That’s just special …

• A Rumson man went missing and it made headlines, even though the guy called home to say he wouldn’t make it for dinner. Yes, this is what made the headlines. The 25-year-old, Gerald White, left home in his 1939 Plymouth sedan on a Monday morning, called to say he wouldn’t be home for “supper” that night. As of Tuesday morning at 1:43 a.m., it was reported to Rumson police that he still hadn’t come home. Yes, this was news. Seems kinda like some social media now. Interesting how news cycles have come full circle. As of Thursday’s printing of the paper, the guy was still ghosting his family.

So … Where’d he go? Well, it’s anyone’s guess, but he was, in fact, the story said, spotted headed toward Freehold with a shotgun and reportedly “planned to go hunting.” OK, then. Doesn’t sound missing to me. He just skipped supper … for two nights. Hmmmm … Guess he didn’t like what was for dinner. Ahem. Ol’ Gerald needed a break, perhaps. Couldn’t get one, though. Seems that him leaving the house for a few hours prompted all to alert the authorities. Hope you had fun, Gerald.

• Another man in a small clip on the front page announced “My wife, having left my bed and board, I will not be responsible for any bills, only those contracted by me.” And, yes, ladies and gentlemen, this is how they handled couples counseling back in the day.

Aaaaaand … Rats! And not of the spousal sort …

• Bet you didn’t know that there was a “rat warfare in Monmouth County” in 1948. The sub-head on the story read, “Baits, traps to be set Thanksgiving.” The lede was funnier than I’m sure any editor realized then. “Costs of keeping rats have gone up, too.” A few years before one rat ate and/or did $20 worth of damage on a farm. “Now, the annual price for keeping a rat is $40.”

The ads

Check it out just for kicks, puffs and giggles … or something …

• For one, cigarettes were advertised for $1 a carton. Hey, those were the days when Thanksgiving meant a game, a smoke-filled room and turkey overdoses. Remember those big ol’ ashtrays on a stand. Sometimes the stand was a large bronze naked lady or something outlandish like that. It was considered ritzy. Classic.

• Then there was this great headline on an ad … “Snuffy Watches Weight by Washing Windows.” We’ll just leave that one there. Squeegee anyone?

• Thanksgiving dinner at the Molly Pitcher was $2.50 and offered some tasty treats, traditional and not. The ad was pretty snappy, too. “With Plenty of Good Reason and Lots of Rhyme at the Hotel Molly Pitcher It’s Thanksgiving Time.” Can you even begin to imagine a meal at the Molly for $2.50? It’s doubtful you can even get a glass of water there for that now. The thing that’s never changed, though? The food. It’s classic, consistently great, and the river is still there. Did you see it in Netflix’s The Beast in Me?

• Then there were those radios. Never mind play lists. Huh? What? There were little radios. Portable home radios, as they were advertised. And they cost 75 cents.

• And here’s a doozy. Dishwashers made a splash. The ad? It went like this … “Yes! Push-button dish washing is here! The Hotpoint dishwasher is the only dishwasher that washes, rinses, dries dishes electrically.” Throw in the towel, folks!

• Another Thanksgiving tradition, as advertised, was none other than beer … Hensler Light Beer, to be exact. That was what was scrolled on the bottom of that ad (above) advertising a cozy, traditional Thanksgiving, with the wife holding that bird as the boys at the table imbibed and the kid may as well have been saying, “Yeah, Ma, could ya bring that bird over here. Everyone’s drunk already.”

• And if you were looking for entertainment, all you had to do was go to the Carlton Theatre in Red Bank (now the Basie) to experience Dr. Ogre Banshee. What a name! This guy was dubbed the Master Manipulator of Spook Operations. OK, then.

There was a warning on this ad — “Sissies Stay Home.” But, really, in the Where’s Waldo of ads, one part just jumps out as Waldo … “It’s worth missing sleep to see Verga take her midnight bath.” What the … ??? But, you know, that’s entertainment in 1948.

Gobble this up …