Remembering Fair Haven’s Garry Allers: A Lifetime of Relative Kindness Passed On

It’s all relative. You’ve heard it before. “He was like family.” Like. And sometimes people just say someone was family, no “like” involved. Family.

That’s usually because sometimes, DNA be damned, someone is no doubt family to someone, or many, in every way but the genetics. And sometimes, that’s just because a person’s actions in life scream a louder familial compassion and love than their genes — like a bear hug that squeezes all the good into us.

One girl called forever Fair Havenite Garry Allers her uncle. Uncle Garry was laid to rest yesterday. While on this Earth, he didn’t flinch at the relative reference from his adopted niece. It was the truth in every way that mattered, after all. Yes, it’s all relative.

What Garry may not have realized, though, was that a whole bunch of Fair Havenites likely considered him a kind, caring father to them and the small borough he loved and nurtured like a child.

Kind. That’s the word that Amanda Lynn said embodied her “uncle.” And his kindness was something he passed on to all his Fair Haven kids. It’s in their smiles and their own gestures, generations later, as they stop to say “Hello” to someone, open a door, help them out or just plain pat them on the back when they’re down or cheer when they’re celebrating.

They may not even know his name, but there was likely at least one time, even a few seconds’ worth, that he touched their lives with the tiniest of kind inflections, that little pat or smile, passing down the best of townie traits without a shred of DNA involved. Family.

So, when it comes time to honor a kind someone “like family” who has passed, there’s no question in the minds of those who considered him family to just say he was family. And no one on the outside looking in with an unbeknownst longing for the kind of connection questions it.

No need when a lifetime of those actions are hollering the truth — to a “niece,” a kid at the playing fields he lovingly groomed, someone he helped through an emergency, an animal, even a person he chatted up at the Acme. It’s those kinds of daily familial truths hammered, with gentle fierceness, into the soul that make it smile. Call it a family secret of the finest kind.

It was a secret that Garry Allers unknowingly kept. That just came naturally, like a good father’s love.

And, as with good nurture, it gets passed down just like a gene. It’s called paying it forward. As many have expressed, Garry’s nature was so unassuming that he likely had no idea of the wide reach of impact even the smallest of his gestures had on so many in his hometown. Family.

When you’re a good parent, uncle, brother, sister, son, daughter, you just do what’s right. No accolades needed. It’s all about love — untainted by material trappings. And love is what Uncle Garry left behind, making the world a better place in a tiny little niche of a peninsula on the Navesink River.

After a lifetime of small, sweet gestures doled out like the largest of candy bars at the “good house” on Halloween, Garry Allers is at rest, his secret kept. It’s up to his relatives to throw away the key and keep passing down those sweet, good genes.

In honor of Garry, “family” requests that you emulate one of his family traits. And, by all means, do try this at home in his beloved fairest of Fair Havens.

Find one here in his obituary, written by his “niece” Amanda Lynn …

Garry M. Allers, 82, of Fair Haven, passed away peacefully at his home on December 5.

Born on July 9, 1942, he was a lifelong resident of Fair Haven, where he will be deeply missed by his many friends and neighbors.

“Before dedicating his career to public service with the Borough of Fair Haven’s Department of Public Works, Garry and his beloved wife, Jeanette, enjoyed a fulfilling career in the food service industry. They worked at several well-known Monmouth County restaurants, including Charlie Brown’s, What’s Your Beef, and Lock Stock and Barrel. Garry often shared fond memories of their time in service, including their travels to Las Vegas to work in casinos and their memorable trip to the famous Brown Derby in California to learn the secrets of their renowned blue cheese dressing. Both Garry and Jeanette were dedicated to their work and took great pride in their profession.”

A proud veteran of the U.S. Army, Garry served in the 101st Airborne Division during the Vietnam War.

Later in life, Garry worked as a dedicated and respected employee for the Borough of Fair Haven’s Department of Public Works for 19 years.

He was especially proud of his work on the athletic fields with him stating the fields were “pristine” when he worked on them, always going above and beyond to make sure they were perfect for the kids of Fair Haven.

Garry was also an active and valued member of the Fair Haven community. He proudly served as a member of the Fair Haven Fire Department for 31 years, achieving the rank of captain of the Fire Police and serving as past president of the Auxiliary. He also found joy in nature as a member of the Fair Haven Garden Club. Garry and Jeanette worked tirelessly to create beautiful gardens at their home, full of ornamental trees and flowers all year long.

Well known for his kindness, generosity, and friendly demeanor, Garry was a beloved figure in Fair Haven. He always had a smile and a helping hand for those in need, readily sharing his tools and expertise to his neighbors. His love for the community was evident in his support of Fair Haven businesses and was a regular fixture at the Acme in town.

Garry was especially fond of Halloween, when he enjoyed the children’s costumes and shared generous portions of full-sized candy bars. Garry was a gifted storyteller, captivating those around him with tales of his service in the Army, his beloved dogs, his pride in his work at DPW, his adventures in the food service industry, and the enduring love he shared with his wife, Jeanette, who predeceased him in 2019.

Garry is survived by: his beloved niece, Amanda Lynn; Jeanette’s siblings, Elsie, Barbara, and Chris; his treasured cat, Dusty; and numerous friends and neighbors.

Memorial visitation was held on Wednesday, Dec.18, at Thompson Memorial Home, Red Bank.